How do you tell someone you don't like the gift they gave you?

We all know that yesterday was Valentine's Day. And after almost seven years of marriage, my husband gives me a gift basket! A gift basket! To me a gift basket is something you give your neighbor, your mother-in-law or even a co-worker. No real thought goes into a gift basket. Someone else carefully selected the items and placed them in a basket. Most of the items in there are things I don't even like. My feelings are hurt.





Now that I've had time to think about it, I know a lot of things I could have said to him, but didn't. Now it's to late to say these things. How to I bring up the subject the day after the gift was given to tell him how I feel?

How do you tell someone you don't like the gift they gave you?
You sound spoiled and unappreciative. You said it took no real thought, if he had no real thought he would have bought you 'nothing'! Maybe he should have given it to his co-worker, they would have probably appreciated it! If the worse thing you encounter in life is a 'gift disappointment' then I'd say life has been pretty darn good to you...try and appreciate it!!!
Reply:Well for one, be grateful you have someone to share the holiday's with.


For two....we have to know that men are totally different operating machines. Females look at it like this "I really lov ehim and care about him, so Im going to go through all the trouble to pick out something special for him. Ill give it a lot of thought and he will be so thrilled!!!"


Then a man thinks "Hey look, a gift basket! Now all the hard work is cutt out! I see a few things she likes in here, she recieves a gift on Valentine's day and it's got the color red."





So you have to give them a major head's up. I tell my husband a few things that I would like for this small holiday. I say "Fine chocolates, small gift card, small piece of jewelry." then I let him make the descion. It's ok to tell people what you want, b/c they you will wind up with something you dont want...like what happened with you.





I would say this "You know, first off I really want to tell you that I am so lucky your my husband. I love you and you are so sweet and thoughtful and caring and I just adore you. I am so grateful that you got me something on Valentine's Day! The fact that you remembered and thought of me was so sweet!


But, the gift you got me just doesnt fit me........ I mean I'll use it because you got it for me and that makes it special but it's my fault I didnt drop a few hints of what I like....so next time I will. Thank you! I love you!"


Good Luck!!!
Reply:I know how you feel. One year for Christmas, my husband and I also got a gift basket.. but from my parents. I felt insulted. I would just blow this off. Your husband meant well and probably just didn't know what to get you. What I would suggest though is to just give him hints of what you like and hopefully he'll get you one of those things. I know we shouldn't have to do stuff like that, but if it means that much to you to get something you like, then that's about all you can do. Casually ask him where he got the idea for your gift and see what he says.
Reply:Well I must say I am not married so the advice I give might not be very useful. [I am in a relationship though] Your husband is a guy you face your whole life. I am guessing that if you don’t tell him that you don’t like the gift and other things, you might burst it on him some day and he would have question marks all over his head.





My friend did tell me once [as I buy gifts for my boyfriend almost every month and his birthday and on occasions] that I might run out of gift for him one day. I am not siding your husband but maybe he did run out of ideas what to give you and when he walk in the mall as he was walking pass a shop it say gift basket for valentine!!! And he was blinded by the fancy wrapping and all the advertising that out of a burst of anxiousness to grab his wife something he got the gift basket.





How about you darling did you get your husband something? Did he like it? Well you can sit down with him and ask him, if he like he gift you gave him or is it useful to him.


Look through the gift basket and see if there is anything you like [I know you don’t like most of the things in it.] pick up those that you like or is useful as household items [food or drinks] leave the rest a side. Then tell him you like this particular item that is in the gift basket. Tell him how useful the others are [household items] [thank him never the less gibe him credit for making to trip to get you the gift =D] and tell him but you don’t know what to do with the others [things you don’t like] make him think the next time when he buys you a gift.





Then maybe when your out with him next time shopping drop some hints to him [things that are affordable for him to buy and you need it or you really want it] well I will say this to my boyfriend “O how nice it [the thing that you want] would be for a Valentine's Day gift, it would be perfect!” Or "Look dear isn't this lovely [then touch the thing abit to show that you like the thing]" =D but don’t say it too many times you might irritate him.





I hope it helps =D
Reply:Sometimes guys really do not remember silly holidays like Valentine's thats why those gift baskets they sell during Valentines, Mother's day, etc. are so lucrative. Since most men are too busy being in their own world to remember these days.





Tell him how you feel but don't make him feel bad. Reassure him that he shouldn't feel bad.





I really think that it is just not fair for us to expect husbands and boyfriends to do things for us on Valentine's day. It's a made up holiday. It's not like Valentine's day is to celebrate the women in the relationship. It suppose to celebrate the couple in the relationship. I do hope you got him a gift or else there is no reason to have your feelings to be hurt.
Reply:Why not think about the gifts he gives you the other 364 days and TRUST me I am not talking about materialistic gifts. I have been reading so many responses from women that we're unhappy with the gifts their mates gave them on this one damn dumb day and I think you are alll ridiculous. Does your man not show you love the other 364 days? Does he not respect you and honor his vows? If so....put on your big girl panties and get a REAL issue. My man insisted on getting me candy and all I wanted was 2 puzzle books because V'day is bull. I have a wonderful man who shows me love everyday and I refuse to mess with that because societies bullsh*t date says I should receive something wonderful on Feb 14 .
Reply:I don't think you should criticize anyone's GIFT. Let's face it, a GIFT is something freely given, that you know you have no right to expect, that you didn't pay for. And what did you give your husband that was so much better, anyway? He probably gave you the gift basket because it was showy and because his mind went blank and he didn't know what else to do. And now it's too late, anyway. I suggest that next time a gift-giving is about to come up (say, your birthday) you talk to him and say, "if you are thinking of getting me anything, here are some ideas of what I'd like". And you could help things further by being sure, when his birthday is coming up, to ask him what HE'D like. If you criticize his gift now, it's like you're saying, "you don't love me enough", or "you have to love me in a certain way". It would be better if you found a way to suggest to him that next time, he try to find out what would please you first.
Reply:From now on do not hint, ask or tell him nicely. I hate that women constantly "hint" at what they want, then expect guys to get it. Remember one additional thing when you do ask for what you want, it is not what you say it is how you say it.





By the way, I dropped hints at my significant other and found she did not get it either, then later I made it a point to tell her so. Works both ways!
Reply:Your feelings are hurt because you don't like A GIFT.





Go look in the dictionary under GIFT.





A GIFT is given for good will.


One is not obligated to GIVE a GIFT.





To consider that a GIFT is somehow not good enough is perhaps the most selfish and self centered attitude a person can adopt.


Is this guy supposed to be tapped into your subconscious definition of what a GIFT is supposed to be and not be.





Frankly, if a person told me that they did not like my GIFT.


I would take it back, return it if I could or give it to someone else and it would be the LAST GIFT they saw from me for a very long time.





Imagine the women who did not get so much as a "happy Valentine's Day" from their mate.





This is disgusting. Count your blessings and learn to appreciate that he got you something. As it is you appear like a selfish brat.





Grow UP.
Reply:It's the thought that counts. How about stopping the gift giving on Valentines' Day?





My husband always buys me great gifts, but I think Valentines' Day is nothing more then an overbloated Hallmark holiday. I told him let's just exchange cards and he cooked me dinner - it was awesome! Tonight I am cooking him dinner. I think it's the way to go.
Reply:I wouldn't say anything. It will only hurt his feelings. Guys are just dumb sometimes.
Reply:Sweetie, a gift basket is okay, trust me.
Reply:BE THANKFUL HE REMEMBERED MOST GUYS DO NOT REMEMBER IN TIME
Reply:If you want to continue receiving gifts, then you don't. All your criticism (no matter how nicely put) will do, is discourage him and make him not want to get you anything. Just remember his heart was in the right place and he was thinking of you---some women don't get anything from their husbands.





Also remember what his fall back gift is and in the future start leaving obvious hints or just out right tell him what you would like. Give him several options to choose from so that you are still surprised.
Reply:Tell him TODAY. Only one day has passed. Tell him What you said Above. He may have just been "desperate" that he wasn't "Better Prepared" and didn't want to come home Empty Handed. Talk to him today. tell him how you feel. Good Luck !!
Reply:Just thank him and act nice, you are very lucky a few of my friends don't even get their wives/girlfriends gifts as they don't believe in valentines day they think its just the shops trying to make money
Reply:You shouldn't say anything, be gracious and thankful that he took the time to go out and buy you a gift basket.
Reply:you are lucky he tried and if you tell him then you will only hurt his feelings. i didn't even get anything. so just be glad he thought about you. not only that this is what you do. go out and buy yourself something that you would like.

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