Wedding/Bridal Shower Gift Etiquette?

I'm going to a bridal shower this weekend and I'm not sure of the gift giving etiquette. It's being held at a country club. They had an engagement party last summer and I brought a gift basket (about $65). How much should I be spending for a shower gift, and should I get a gift off of the registry? Also, the wedding is in mid September and is also formal. I will be bringing a date to the wedding. Should I bring a money gift or should I purchase and mail a gift in advance of the wedding?



What's the proper etiquette for wedding/shower gift giving?

Wedding/Bridal Shower Gift Etiquette?
I would definitley get the shower gift from the registry. The bride and groom probably spent a lot of time picking out what they wanted and are excited to receive those gifts.



If you spent $65 for the engagement gift, I would spend at least that much or more for the shower gift.



As for the wedding, I think that either putting money in a card or mailing a gift in advance would be appropriate.



I don't think that there is "proper" ettiquitte for all of this or if there is people seldom know it and they just go by what their family or community traditions are. What I have listed are just my opinions. I have found when talking with friends and co-workers, that everyone has different expectations of what is to happen at weddings. However, buying from the registry, and giving money have never been argued by any of my friends or co-workers :)



Hope you have fun at the upcoming events!
Reply:You gave a lot for the engagement party; more than was expected of you. For the shower, purchase off of the registry and spend what you can reasonably afford. For the wedding, bring a card with you to the wedding with a check or cash enclosed. If this is for family or close friends, you can ask around to see how much others might be giving, and then base how much you give accordingly.
Reply:Regarding the wedding gift, it is far more considerate to mail it, because it is always a problem for the couple to get all of the gifts home from the reception.

Having given an engagement gift, and having the intention of giving a wedding gift, I think that you should keep the shower gift fairly modest. The cost of being a friend of the bridal couple is getting ridiculous.

It is always convenient to get something off the registry, but the choosing of shower gifts are often an opportunity for the guests to be creative.

I knew someone who had had the bride call her a few times for a particular brownie recipe. So, for the shower, she framed the recipe, and gave the bride a pan to make the brownies in, and some semi-sweet chocolate. The recipe hung in the bride's kitchen for years.

Have fun.
Reply:Hi, my almost twin!

Well, what you gave as the engagement gift (which isn't required) would have been a great shower gift. You could choose something off the registry, or just go shopping for something you think they might like.

For the wedding, take a gift along with you to the reception - whether money or a physical gift. Good luck shopping for your gown, and your date choosing a tux!!!
Reply:You should spend what you can afford on this shower gift. I do suggest buying something off the registry. There is usually a range of prices to choose from. (From my experience most people spend $20 to $40 for a friend or distant relative and $40 to $100 for a closer friend or relative)



As for the wedding, I would bring a monetary gift. I try to always cover my plate so I tend to give $100 per person. So if you are bringing a date $200.



Just for point of information I live in Chicago and wedding are VERY expensive here. If you live in a smaller town I would adjust accordingly.
Reply:Yes, yes, yes. A gift for each occasion. I would get a gift off the registry ($50-100) and give a money gift for the wedding ($150).
Reply:Well since your a good gift giver want to come to my wedding??

Anyways buy something small for the shower so you dont go empty handed then a card with 100 should be fine for the wedding day!!
Reply:I would do a registry gift of about $30-$50... for the wedding you want to cover the cost of you and your date and if it's at a formal place also, I would assume around $200+ for the couple
Reply:Okay, so you've already bought one present and are planning on giving something else at the wedding itself. Yes, you should still take something to the shower, but it's perfectly okay to give something small this time. Check their registry as a good starting place for ideas. If there's not anything you like or in your price range, consider buying a cute picture frame or something along those lines. Cute and considerate, but less expensive.



As for the wedding itself, any of the options you've mentioned will be fine. You may either bring a gift the day of the wedding (either cash, check or a gift) or you can mail it in advance. If you'll be traveling for the wedding, it may be easier on you to ship the gift rather than lugging it through airport security.
Reply:that was a very generous engagement gift you gave them. i would personally not spend that much on the shower gift. i always give about a 30 dollar gift for the shower and more for the wedding. i consider the shower gift to be just from me and the wedding gift is from me and my husband.



i always try to go off the registry unless for some reason i can not find out where they are registered. then i try my best to figure out what the couple likes.



personally i think mailing a gift is a pain. putting all the presents in my car after the wedding was not that hard and people did not have to spend the extra cash on shipping.
Reply:1st of all... good gosh how many gifts does a person have to give.. We did neither the bridal shower nor the engament party..



as much as I hate registries.. you can never go wrong with getting what people have on them b/c it is thier style and taste that they have choosen..



since you have spent about 65 on the engament gift I would spend around about the same on the shower gift...



I would say if you are already bringing something to the bridal shower then I honestly wouldnt spend anymore.. I thought that is what they were for.. But if you want to.. I would give about $50.. But that is my opinion..