Ls it bad manners not to buy a gift(s) for a family members new baby?

A family member is pregnant, and her daughter is only 9 months old. Before she was born l spent a LOT of time and money putting together a gift basket + some bigger gifts for her. Since she was born l've never seen her wear any of the clothes, have any of the toys, use the orthodontic pacifiers and bottles etc. She's always dirty, has no toys, etc. Anyway, l really don't want to buy anything except a small stuff toy or token for the new baby because l know the child won't get it! ls this ok?

Ls it bad manners not to buy a gift(s) for a family members new baby?
do not put too much time and money in it...go to the dollar store. or buy them some diapers, you know those will be used. also, just because they didnt use it in front of you doesnt mean they didnt use it. as a parent, I have received many items that just werent used, especially toys and clothes, but i did always use the diapers.
Reply:Yeah. It is. It's sad.
Reply:sounds good to me, I would just do what you said, it doen't seem like she descives any more that that.
Reply:Buy useful and helpful smaller gifts. Shampoo, washcloths, baby soap, rash cream, diapers, onesies in newborn and the next size up.

The Mom might need some financial help, or some mental health. Maybe she is overstressed, with a nine month old, now the new one is coming.

The baby has no clue about what it got at the shower. Make the gifts something the Mom needs, and can't sell.
Reply:It is sad, but the mother might be financially struggling and selling your gifts just to get by.

Maybe a gift card might be more appropriate.
Reply:of course it is ok, it is sending a signal that your prior gifts were unappreciated.
Reply:Instead of buying the baby a gift by mommy some birth control.
Reply:How could it be



My sister was annoyed at me for not attending her sons first birthday party.



My response was that her attitude was silly



Why should I attend an event where the guest of honour doesn't care whether I am there or not and in fact would not even be aware if I did make an appearence.



As for presents I would say the above applies, except for one thing.



The situation you describe is terrible. Is the mother simply not coping or is the problem worse than this.



Does the mother just need help, or does the family need to apply pressure to ensure the childs well being.



I personally feel that the issue of manners at this stage is totally irrelevant. The health and wellbeing of the children is paramount.

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